I was shocked an hour ago to hear that Charlie Kirk had been assassinated. I’m not going to try to play news-guy, that’s not my calling in life, nor the purpose of my website. That being said, I was shocked and saddened to hear that he had been shot while at an engagement at UVU, down in the sleepy town of Provo, UT.

I definitely didn’t agree with everything he said, and I’m not a huge fan of political rhetoric, but it is really sad to me that we have come to a point that people are getting killed for their beliefs, on all sides of the political aisle. Whatever his faults, he didn’t deserve to die. Most of the debates I’ve seen of his, he was calm, collected, and generally respectful. He wasn’t afraid to call people out on their B.S. He did, I feel, jump the gun and put people in groups a little fast, often saying “that’s what a leftist looks like.” Though most often, I agreed with him on his assessment.

I admired his willingness to stand up for and speak what he believed, and I don’t feel he flip-flopped on his stances- he knew what he believed, and spoke to those beliefs. I respect that in a person.

I had the opportunity to see and meet him many moons ago (this was before President Trump’s first election), and thought he was just outstanding.

At the same time I was hearing about Charlie Kirk, I heard about a school. shooting in Colorado. That, too, is really saddening. I’m really sad for those young lives that have been lost today, and for the others that have been lost and forever damaged by the horrible choices of the people committing these acts.

It’s hard to imagine, for me, why someone would want to take the life of another person. Even in jest, that level of commitment, hatred, dislike, frustration, is hard for me to comprehend. I’ve thought, often, about taking my own life, but never the life of another person. Both ways are really sad and disheartening.

What to do about this? I’m not at all a proponent of gun control, and I don’t think Charlie Kirk would agree, even now, to having more restrictions put on guns and those that own them. Mental health challenges, for sure, should be helped more. In my opinion, as ignorant as it is, psychologists and therapists can be just as damaging as they can help. Too often I’ve seen the answer is to take a pill, or blame someone else for the issues. Maybe that can help, but at least in my experience, dealing with my own crap, that isn’t much help.

So what is the best way to help curb this insanity? This growing problem of murder? I’m not really sure the murder problem is growing, but our awareness of it certainly is. I think the only real answer is Jesus Christ. I’m not trying to be cheeky when I say that. I truly do feel the only way for the world to heal, is through the power of Jesus Christ. I’ve seen it in my own life, how learning and studying Him, and His word, and learning to put my trust in Him, is the only way to really be able to heal the hurts that make others want to hurt. I do feel sometimes when we are hurting, the only way we know how to cope with that hurt is to cause hurt ourselves. That may take the form of self-harm, and in the worst cases, harming others. How often to parents yell at children, not because they are really mad at the child, but because they are hurting for other reasons, and the child just sparks the reaction? I know I’ve done that. How often have I been worried about something going on in life and a completely innocent person says something that sparks a horrible response from me? Too many to count. Jesus is the answer. Learning to give Him the pain, the hurt, the suffering, that is the answer. I’m no pro at that- I hold on to my pain more than I hold on to anything else. But I have seen, in those moments when I can let go of it, the pain eases faster and more completely that way than any other way.

And when learning to follow Jesus, and to trust Him, I’ve found other tools come my way, which help me to get better habits, more control over my thoughts and actions. Learning to change, and being changed by His Atonement is one of the hardest things I’ve had to do. Learning how to not take things personally- I’m an empathic person. That sounds great, except that means I tend to take other people’s moods personally. I tend to take their frustrations with life as a reflection on my worth as a human being. That is not healthy at all! Learning how to separate those feelings and reframe the self talk has been one of the most challenging things I’ve ever done.

I wasn’t trying to turn this into a religious rant, I just wanted to share my sadness about today’s events. And my testimony that I know God lives, that Jesus lives, and that through him, all wounds can be healed.